Saturday, September 26, 2009

Of the mirror I ask;
Is the sadness an essential part of who I am? Is it an expression of my soul, or is it a heavy blanket of memories and disappointments, sabotaging the momentum of spirit?
If our lives are artwork, commissioned by God, then sadness might be part of the beauty and meaning. To deny it would be to create a shallow work of trite optimism. But if the portrait becomes an ode to disillusionment, will it satisfy the artist - our soul, upon completion? And will it please our benefactor?
But I suppose the real question is; Do we have a choice? Does free will grant us the super-power to extricate our identification with the cumulative imprint of our negative experiences? And if so, would that serve the commission?
My internal constitution legislates a commitment to both optimism and authenticity. I pledge allegiance to optimism because it is in alignment with the spirit of ascending energy. And this commitment dictates that I keep faith in the higher potential for humanity, despite ample demonstrations of our flaws. Yet authenticity dictates that I incorporate the whole of my experience - including the negative, into the tone of my testament. I want my artwork to be both inspiring and true... Don't we all?
These experiments with the observer self are taking me down a path of diminishing identification with my story. I am going to try setting aside the old blanket of my sadness (quilted with disappointments). Let me know if my testament begins to ring shallow or inauthentic as a result. Or join me if your blanket has become an impediment to creating the inspiring life art you had hoped to create.

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